The Weight of the World

From my hairdresser, my family vet, my doctor, and even my next door neighbor there was gobs of candy available everywhere.

And, of course there is no way of getting around it…at the grocery store candy is available in bulk…and it’s true…for some, it’s easier that way. Not so many shopping trips, I guess. And if anyone is like me, you are not waiting to get home to deep dive into these big bags of candy. Why wait?

If anyone knows me personally then they know about my sweet, candy-love and so it is true that some friends, acquaintances, and family members are surprised to see me today. I get the comments, “You look so…very different.” “What have you done?”.

I politely give them a big smile.

Yes. It was around this time last year that I was at least 4o lbs heavier than I am today. And I say I was at least 40 lbs heavier…but I don’t know for sure. It could have been more…and I highly doubt it was less.

Yes. One year ago I was too embarrassed to actually get on my bathroom scale to see my weight. I had stopped weighing myself because it was too painful. To see the number that had jumped higher and higher month after month and year after year was too much.

Then one day I decided that, right before Halloween, while eating bags of candy, I knew that I had had enough…I felt sick, tired, and unattractive. So I finally gave up…or is it…I finally gave in. I made the choice to cut sugar…and mainly candy out of my diet.

But first…as always, there is a backstory to this tale.

The impetus all started with a routine trip to my dentist that confirmed the brittle state of my teeth as they crumbled at the mere touch of the dental tools. I needed a lot of dental work…my mouth was a mess, my teeth were yellowed and the future of my teeth was not good. And so, that was the final straw that sent me over the edge.

My plan was to accomplish the two goals…slimming down by getting off sugary sweets and having my teeth brought up to an “acceptable” dental standard. It was all good. And it seemed to be a perfect plan. From now on candy was not to be on my menu. EVER. “Ever?”, I asked my dentist at first. “Yes. No more candy.”, came the reply.

Now I was playing in a whole different ball park. A situation that I was completely and totally uncomfortable in. But I was still unsure and I questioned to myself, “How much do I want this?” True…I had to admit that I was feeling self-conscious, unworthy, and depressed. I also felt defeated, betrayed, tired, and lazy. Not a good place to be. So I reasoned that I would set out with determination to achieve the two goals.

The thing about goals is you and you alone are responsible for succeeding or failing. Which one are you choosing?

Sure you can ask the experts, go on YouTube to get advice, talk to people that have similar experiences, and scour the Internet for tips and tricks. And after all that research the end result will always be you. Only you, in the quiet moments, knows what you have to do. And what you feel uncomfortable doing.

Uncomfortable. There I wrote that one word.

Do I want to stay where I am…in my comfort zone? Or do I want to feel a little uncomfortable, for awhile, and create a better me? The latter choice seemed harder but so worth it…if I could accomplish it.

Surprisingly, once I decided that it was worth it and took a deep breath it all fell into place. Just like that.

By trusting my inner self, by knowing I could never go back to my old self, and by listening when I had my quiet, self reflections I completely stopped obsessing over my daily ups and downs. And with these goals I got to work on other projects to occupy my time.

Was I craving sugar? Yes. Was going to the dentist multiple times for necessary dental work fun? Nope.

I was doing the things I knew I had to do. These experiences would bring me so much more than having a thinner body to look at in the mirror and a smile that I was proud of.

These experiences would make me a stronger person and would give me a sense of accomplishment that I had never experienced. These two goals would tell me that anything is possible…even the really hard things.

I knew, with certainty, that one day soon I would look back and know that the decisions were my choice alone and I had turned a corner to have a better and more satisfying life. I had grown as a person and would never go back. The more I accepted my new and different life, the more things I accomplished. And the easier my dreams and desires came my way.

This can happen to you, too. Imagine what you want from life. Be self reflective. See the goals clearly. Is it health, wealth, a great relationship, confidence, friends, a business venture, travel? Whatever it is, it is attainable.

Some may say that I only changed my body physically and that that doesn’t count. But it does. Everything we reflect on in this world using our five senses comes to pass…like it or not. And everything that we imagine and emotionalize will come to us in our physical being.

As soon as we acknowledge this simple truth, the more change we will see in our daily life. And the happier we become.

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